First Lines...

Somehow, I don't think this line would go over well with any woman...

Jareth: I ask for so little. Just fear me, love me, do as I say and I will be your slave.

Labyrinth

Yeah, that one didn't work out so well for Jareth either. What are some of the worst first lines you have heard of? Put it in a comment.

Balancing Dreams and Priorities

[In response to Ray Kinsella's asking him what his dream is...]
Dr. Archibald "Moonlight" Graham: Well, you know I... I never got to bat in the major leagues. I would have liked to have had that chance. Just once. To stare down a big league pitcher. To stare him down, and just as he goes into his windup, wink. Make him think you know something he doesn't. That's what I wish for. Chance to squint at a sky so blue that it hurts your eyes just to look at it. To feel the tingling in your arm as you connect with the ball. To run the bases - stretch a double into a triple, and flop face-first into third, wrap your arms around the bag. That's my wish, Ray Kinsella. That's my wish. And is there enough magic out there in the moonlight to make this dream come true?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[When Dr. Graham rejects Ray's offer to go back with him...]
Ray Kinsella: Fifty years ago, for five minutes you came within... y-you came this close. It would KILL some men to get so close to their dream and not touch it. God, they'd consider it a tragedy.
Dr. Archibald "Moonlight" Graham: Son, if I'd only gotten to be a doctor for five minutes... now that would have been a tragedy.

Field of Dreams


A lot of people like to relive the "glory days" in their mind. Former athletes remember the big plays and women remember when they had a more enviable figure. But would you really give up all that you have earned through your blood, sweat and toil to go back to those days? As enviable as those days seem sometimes, I know I wouldn't. The things I have now are far better than anything I had back then. I have a loving wife, amazing kids, knowledge and experience, increased faith and a trust in God that I never dreamed of having in my younger years. Like Dr. Graham, if I had only five minutes of that in my life, that would have been a great tragedy.

Back to School Info

For all the kids that had to go back to school today or are headed back to school in the near future, this information may come in handy at some point this year...

Ferris: The key to faking out the parents is the clammy hands. It's a good non-specific symptom; I'm a big believer in it. A lot of people will tell you that a good phony fever is a dead lock, but, uh... you get a nervous mother, you could wind up in a doctor's office. That's worse than school. You fake a stomach cramp, and when you're bent over, moaning and wailing, you lick your palms. It's a little childish and stupid, but then, so is high school.

Ferris Bueller's Day Off

The 11th Commandment...

...Thou shalt not park in a tow-away zone!


[Their van is being towed]
Jack: Stop! Who dares to tow the van of the living Christ?
Driver: The city of New York, Tarzan! $50 for the violation, $75 for the tow and $20 a day for storage.
Jack: [Skyward] Father, forgive us for we have sinned! We parked our car in a forbidden zone!

The Dream Team

An "Odd" Quote...

I love to read books. One of the reasons I love to read is because I find some of the most profound quotes I have ever come across in some of the oddest books. The quote I would like to share with you today comes from the book Odd Hours by Dean Koontz.

To provide a little background for how this particular quote came up, the hero of the story, Odd Thomas, was picked up by an older woman named Birdie Hopkins who receives flashes of intuition and feels the need to drive towards someone in need of help. She was just explaining to Odd that these flashes started coming just after her husband, Fred, died seven years ago and she said:

"Love somebody from when you're nineteen, one day he's the same as ever, next day dead. So many tears, they seem to wash somethin' out of you, they leave this emptiness."

"Loss is the hardest thing," I said. "But it's also the teacher that's the most difficult to ignore."

Her fanning hand went still. She regarded me with an expression that I took to be surprised agreement.

Because Birdie seemed to expect me to elucidate, I fumbled out what I thought she might want to say herself: "Grief can destroy you - or focus you. You can decide a relationship was all for nothing if it had to end in death, and you alone. Or you can realize that every moment of it had more meaning than you dared to recognize at the time, so much meaning it scared you, so you just lived, just took for granted the love and laughter of each day, and didn't allow yourself to consider the sacredness of it. But when it's over and you're alone, you begin to see it wasn't just a movie and a dinner together, not just watching sunsets together, not just scrubbing a floor or washing dishes together or worrying over a high electric bill. It was everything, it was the why of life, ever event and precious moment of it. The answer to the mystery of existence is the love you shared sometimes so imperfectly, and when the loss wakes you to the deeper beauty of it, to the sanctity of it, you can't get off your knees for a long time, you're driven to your knees not by the weight of the loss but by gratitude for what preceded the loss. And the ache is always there, but one day not the emptiness, because to nurture the emptiness, to take solace in it, is to disrespect the gift of life."

I guess one reason why this quote struck me was because of the recent loss of my wife's grandfather, the loss of a friend close to my age, and the loss of my wife's friend's mother (you can read more about this in my wife's Grace Under Fire post). I have seen many people lose those who are near and dear to them, and I, too, have been on the losing end myself. I have not had to face the difficulty of losing a spouse (thank the Lord for that), but I have lost love in such a manner that I could feel the truth of Odd's words.

We do take the time we have with those who are near and dear to us for granted. We never expect it to end any time soon. But when it does we are left feeling empty. I like how he says that our experiences with our loved ones are "the why of life". It explains why so many who have lost their loved ones do not care to live longer. They feel the reason why they lived is gone and life itself does not have any value to them any longer.

A loss can waken you to the deeper beauty of love, but one does not have to lose to wake up. Look around you and consider for a moment who you take for granted. Who would you miss if tomorrow you woke up and they were gone? I hope after you have the answer to that question that you will take a moment today to tell them just how much you love and appreciate them and what a difference they make to you in your life.

Now, if you will excuse me, I must go and give my wife all the love that I possibly can before this day is done.

Someone's here so...

Ace Ventura: If I'm not back in five minutes... just wait longer.

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective

Kids in the Back Seat

Anybody who has ever had to drive anywhere with kids in the back seat can appreciate this dialogue. Just picture Jason as "Daddy", Gwen as "Mommy", Alexander as "the older brother" and Guy as "the younger brother" and see how it fits with your experiences.

[the crew is on a shuttle descending to an alien planet]
Guy Fleegman: I changed my mind. I wanna go back.
Sir Alexander Dane: After the fuss you made about getting left behind?
Guy Fleegman: Yeah, but that's when I thought I was the crewman that stays on the ship, and something is up there, and it kills me. But now I'm thinking I'm the guy who gets killed by some monster five minutes after we land on the planet.
Jason Nesmith: You're not gonna die on the planet, Guy.
Guy Fleegman: I'm not? Then what's my last name?
Jason Nesmith: It's, uh, uh - -I don't know.
Guy Fleegman: Nobody knows. Do you know why? Because my character isn't important enough for a last name, because I'm gonna die five minutes in.
Gwen DeMarco: Guy, you have a last name.
Guy Fleegman: DO I? DO I? For all you know, I'm "Crewman Number Six"! Mommy... mommy...
Sir Alexander Dane: Are we there yet?

Galaxy Quest

See what I mean?

Simple Solutions

In life, some of the most difficult problems can have the simplest of solutions. For example:

Jack: [deadpan] Dirt. This is a jar of dirt.
Tia Dalma: Yes.
Jack: Is the jar of dirt going to help?
Tia Dalma: If you no want it, give it back.
Jack: [pulling the jar closer.] No.
Tia Dalma: [smiling] Then it helps.

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest


My kids would love to have a jar of dirt. What little boy wouldn't? I always wonder what they would do with such an object, and they always tend to surprise me. Perhaps if they had a jar of dirt, they would do something like this....

Feeling blue...

No. I am not depressed. But I am feeling a little blue today because I HAD TO TAKE A FREEZING-COLD SHOWER TODAY!!! Some would say that isn't so bad, but I vehemently disagree with you. Being a child of the 80's, I saw plenty of sitcoms with references to cold showers. I just never saw the attraction. In fact, while I was growing up, I would turn the cold water all the way off and see how long I could stand in the stream before I felt like I was burning.


Not today, though. There was no hot water; no warm water; not even just cool water. Only ICE-COLD water! It may not have been so bad except for the fact that I had just come home from playing basketball and I was really hot and sweaty. The minute that water hit me, I felt like someone took a hammer to my chest. I could just picture my heart happily and easily pumping nice, warm, quick-flowing blood and then ... WHAM! ... it is suddenly thrown into low gear by the presence of fast-cooled, congealing blood that requires much more effort to pump the now toothpaste-like substance. I know that is a little dramatic, but, for the first time in memory, I couldn't wait to turn off the water and step out into the cool morning air blowing in through the window so that I could warm up!

My reason for becoming a human popsicle this morning is that our poor, sad little water heater (well, I guess 66 gallons isn't so little) finally gave up the ghost yesterday. It has been slowly leaking for a long time now and every time we fixed the leak in one spot another would pop up. It is just one more piece of evidence that the last person who lived here really had no clue what they were doing when they made updates to the place. The leaks started out as slow and seeped down the pipes and underneath the outer shell of the water heater, soaked into the insulation and, eventually, started dripping out the bottom. We made plans to replace it in the near future, but, when the water fried the power supply, the future become very near and urgent.

So we started the tank draining last night and we froze our butts off this morning (and when I say "we", I mean "me" since I was the only one that had to shower). We bought a new tank today and, for once, it went in without a hitch - which is a novel and completely unfamiliar experience when it comes to Jensen family home repairs.

I will say, however, that this experience has made me extremely grateful for one more luxury that I take for granted. I think about people in the past who never knew what water heaters were and either boiled water over a fire for warmth or bathed with freezing cold water. I am sure that there are even people today who do not have a water heater and would very much like one. I am grateful to have had one these past few years, even though it did not work very well. I am grateful for the financial blessings that made replacing it relatively painless. And, most of all, I am grateful for our wonderful friends and amazing family members who are always willing to give us their time, their knowledge and wisdom and their strength when these unexpected challenges arise. It is all rock-solid evidence of how blessed I truly am.

How to deal...

A way to deal with your spouse's past significant other...

John Smith: [during a car chase] I never told you, but I was married once before.
Jane Smith: [slams on the brakes throwing John into the front seat]
John Smith: What's wrong with you?
Jane Smith: [hitting John] You're what's wrong with me John.
John Smith: It was just a drunken Vegas thing.
Jane Smith: Oh, that's better. That's much better.
[pause]
Jane Smith: What's her name and social security number?
John Smith: No, you're not gonna kill her.

Mr. & Mrs. Smith (2005)

Out of Focus ... and Coming Back In!

Did you miss me? (Echo! Echo! Echo! Echo!)

Probably not, but I'm back anyways. I am sure that I have probably lost my two or three readers in my absence, but I am hoping they will stumble on back.

I haven't been on for a while in part due to a very busy summer schedule (vacation, Scout Camp, inventory audits at work, etc.) but also because I have been struggling a little bit with my focus - both for this blog and for my life. The biggest struggle I have had with it is deciding where I want to put it. Confused? Let me explain.

I tend to live a very boring life. Not much changes from day to day simply because there is not a large amount of time to change it in. I never wanted to be one of those bloggers that simply detailed what they did throughout the day, primarily because you would only have to read one or two posts and you would have pretty much read them all. I would write: "I got up this morning and delivered newspapers. Then I went to work and did some accounting. After work I had dinner and fell asleep watching T.V./reading a book and then I went to bed." The only thing that would change would be the ending. Some days it would say "went to Boy Scouts" and others "did some housework/yard work" (Now don't go into shock, ladies. I do housework from time to time. I just tend to leave the toilet scrubbing to my wife.) Other than that, the days would pretty much all be the same.

In recent weeks, I have been considering where to put my focus for my life. One thing that I really love doing is writing creatively. I think this is mainly because I love being entertained and inspired and so I try to entertain and, on occasion, inspire others. I intend to be a published writer and have several starts for several promising story lines. Due to my idea avalanche, I had to set the others aside and focus in on one story in order to get somewhere. I outlined the plot from the beginning to almost the end, but started procrastinating for a while because I couldn't quite work out the way I wanted to wrap it up.

I eventually figured out that I wasn't going to make any progress if I expected it to be perfect all the time and decided to just start writing and let the ending take care of itself. Then I started to struggle with feelings of guilt because there are so many projects around the house that have been left unfinished (and some not even begun). So, when I had a couple of days off work while Noelle was at Beehive Camp, I tackled those projects instead of tackling the story. I didn't get them all done, but I got them to the point where I can tackle the rest of them in incremental bites of time.

I am now working to establish a daily writing period where I can really focus in and write (hopefully without too many distractions). I figure if I can get in at least 30 minutes a day, if not more, I can really make some significant progress and accomplish one of my major goals in life. On the days where the inspiration for that particular story line isn't flowing, I will focus on developing and fleshing out some of the other ideas I have, short stories, or writing exercises.

For this blog, I will share my progress with you and let you know where you can go to read the chapters as I complete them. I hope you will take time to read them and give me feedback on where you feel they are strong and, more importantly, what you feel needs to be done to improve them. When I do not have anything particular to share as far as the story goes, I hope you will come back each day to read some "Day in the Life of a Nice Guy" experiences and some other ideas that I will post each day to entertain and inspire you. Come back often because I intend to be around here quite a bit!

I know that I am probably only talking to two or three people, but I hope that more and more will find their way here that may be interested in weighing in on my writing or simply getting a good laugh or two in every now and then.

P.S. --- I have been waiting to post about the awesome vacation my wife (who I am sure, if you know her personally, has already told you all about it) and I took last month because we haven't downloaded the pictures from our camera due to a missing usb cable. We finally have the pictures downloaded so I am hoping to share some of our experiences with you shortly.